To One and All...

Couple's Corner #7: Misunderstanding

It's time for Couple's Corner created by Liza of This is My Life. This week's Topic is all about "Misunderstanding."

We all know that in every relationship, be it friendship, marriage, family etc..., misunderstanding cannot be avoided. Most misunderstanding that Matt and I had were all my faults especially during the first few years of our marriage. The very reason of our misunderstanding were all about language barrier. I was so sensitive enough to take what he said in a wrong way. Thank goodness, he is very understanding, loving, and patient with all the little fights caused by me. Yup, even the small things, I made big deal out of it! I don't want to elaborate them because now, as I think about it, was all very childish.

I remember one time, I got so upset with a small thing; I can't really remember what that thing was, I just went in our bedroom crying. He tried to talk to me to know what did he do wrong, but I remained silent and was crying (I always do that), he became so frustrated and upset, he hits the wall and his hand bled (this never happened again). That time I became nervous because he has never done that before. I told to myself, he must be that upset. Well, that was the first time that I apologized to him which I never done ever since we got married. Even though it was my fault, he is always the one who apologizes first; but not that time! Yup, that was how prideful I was before. Now, when I get really upset (rarely happens), I cry hard saying " I want to go home, and that I don't belong here." I don't really mean it when I say those two phrases... just trying to scare him. Anyway, the good thing about misunderstanding is that, we always kiss and make up. We make sure that on every fights we had, we never let a day passed without talking things over. No more silent treatment for it is not healthy for our marriage and will not fix any problem between us.

COUPLE’S CORNER #6: First Year of Being Married

It's Couple's Corner once again hosted by Liza; and time for me to share a a summary of the first year of being married.

The first year of us being married was one of the happiest years of my life. Though we came from totally different countries, cultures, background and language, I can say that we were able to put our differences aside and exercise compromise to make our marriage work. My husband is a very understanding man who knows how to handle difficult situations and makes me feel better. It was a big adjustment for both of us, but because of our love for each other and with God's helped those differences helped us know each other more. Being a Filipina, I am a sensitive; I easily cry and that was hard for him, not knowing what to do because I wouldn’t talk. But later on, when I explained that to him, he understood and knew already when to back off and let me deal with the problem. Don't get me wrong, we didn't really had a big fight at all. It was just me. Anyway, and when I am ready to talk, he is there to listen. We are not a perfect couple and so is our marriage…and just like every marriages, we have ups and downs, but the important thing is we are there to talk things over, find a solution together and support each other. There many things I like about being married: first you become one, your last name changed, no more inhibitions, no secrets, you share everything to each other. Looking back, I’ll say that the first 365 days of our marriage was amazing and was full of love and learning experiences that we will both cherish for as long as we live. God is and was our guide then and now.

Operation Smile!

To a very talented, athletic, simple, and sweet Woman I've met online....Clarissa; I just want to let you know that I am grateful to have known you. We may never meet in person yet, but I can feel your sincere friendship and love! I am sure when we finally meet you will be more than what I have expected you to be. Stay what you are for that is the only way to be happy! Thanks for being a good friend to me and many!

Whatever with the past has gone,The best is always yet to come. - Lucy Larcom

One More Day...

I saw this video at youtube and felt sad, because this reminds me and my husband when we lost our first baby on stillborn. The lyrics of this song is what exactly we felt when we were grieving for our lost. "I remember thinking, "this is not real/true, this can't be happening, this isn't happening. I remember both of us crying out, I remember Matt crying out, I remember him holding me, and both of us sobbing." On that moment our bereaved life changes in the instant." I still cry every time I think of her... and blames myself for I think that it was all my fault why she died. The doctor tried to explain with me that it wasn't my fault or the things I did or didn't do. Can you blame me for feeling that way still? I love her so much! Though I know we would be able to be reunited with her someday, knowing that she not here, makes me feel empty still. She was back to Heavenly Father for a reason of which I don't know...but am sure she is happy that we are doing our "best" here on earth just to be with her someday! I know for sure that "Families Can Be Together Forever.....someday."

"ONE MORE DAY"
sung by: Rocket Club Band

I'll never get to hold you
I'll never hear your sweet voice sing
I'll never get to say 'I told you so'
I'll never read to you, or get to teach you anything
But you'll always be my hope
You'll always be my first light
You're always gonna be Daddy's little girl
You'll always be the strength I need to make it in this world
I only wish for one more day
I'm gonna miss your first day of school
I'll never see you turn that page
I'll never see you in your graduation gown
And I'm never gonna see you coming of age
But you'll always be my hope
You'll always be my first light
You're always gonna be Mommy's little girl
You'll always be the strength I need to make it in this world
I only wish for one more day
Sweet angel of mercy
Coming down to comfort me
Faith, sit right here beside me
I never want you to go away
I'm always gonna wonder how you'd look
Always gonna wish I took your place up there
You'll always be our hope
You'll always be our first light
You're always gonna be our little girl
You'll always be the strength we need to make it in this world
We only wish for one more day
We only wish for one more day."

Couple's Corner #5: The Day We said I DO!

It's Wednesday once again, time for my most awaited meme hosted by Liza of This Is My Life. And here is my entry for this week's theme "The Day We Said I Do."

Can you believe it? I knew we will be married, and that is why I came to United Sates, but no idea yet when the exact date will be! Well, it was because we (Matt and I) haven't talked about it yet. So when my cousin and her husband and of course Matt picked me up at the airport (LAX), we immediately head into my cousin's house, talked while eating dinner. Though we were both exhausted from our flights, we still managed to talk a little bit about our day before finally went to bed in our respective room. The next day, he surprised me when he told me the exact date of our wedding! I was thrilled of course! I arrived on the 8th of Sept. 2001 and our wedding date was set two weeks after that. Yup, that fast; that is how he was back then; he didn't waste time!

Two days after that surprised, a shocking news 9/11 happened. The whole world were saddened and mourned for the great lost of loved ones. Flights were canceled and I think they also closed the airport. So, we ended waiting for a week before we finally had our flight home to Texas and that means, we need to prepare ourselves. In addition, we still need to buy our wedding ring/band and head home to New Mexico to get married. Since we both have no savings, that is all we can afford that time and that was fine with me, since I am a simple and low maintenance person. All I want is a simple wedding anyway. His parents were kind enough to buy me a wedding gown, arranged the reception and the prepare all the foods (finger foods, sparkling wine and cake), wedding announcement, photographer and even gave us a present which is a fully paid hotel reservation for our honeymoon. Everything were set! Except that they needed to alter my wedding gown because I already gained weight before the wedding....thanks to some restaurants in TX and NM!

To make the story short, we got married with only few of his relatives, friends and family members; his sister was so upset and decided she didn't want to be there because of our religious practices. She left the day of our wedding and that was sad :-( not to mention that no member in my family from Philippines, and of my relatives in the U.S. managed to attend because of such a short noticed. But the wedding must go on whether she (SIL) was there or not! We still think that to this day, she still couldn't pass that. That is why every time we talk about our faith, she will just stop talking and listen or change the topic. Matt and I finally said our "I Do's" and it's been eight years now and we are still happy and in-love, and blessed with two wonderful kids. Thanks to my parents who are very understanding, supportive, respectful and loving, for without them, I wouldn't be what I am today! I love you, Inang and Ama! I will forever be grateful for you, guys! I hope you know that I love you; and that think of you constantly though we are millions of miles away from each other. I also thanked my in-laws for all the helped; and my Aunt's husband who treated me like his own relatives while living with them in Malaysia, and gave me a plane ticket as a wedding present which surprised us both. Matt was supposed to buy it for me though.

The Wedding Cake Test

You Are an Intimate Wedding

Love makes you feel warm and comforted. You may not need much in this world, but you need the love of those you're close to to survive. To be unloved would be heartbreaking for sure, but you would never give up hope. Even if you felt all alone in the world, you're sure you could make new connections. For you, romantic loving is about giving your all and not worrying about what you'll get back in return. Keeping score ruins a relationship. Besides, your ideal partner would naturally want to give as much as possible too. That's what makes you a perfect match.

The Wedding Cake Test

Family Quotations

I got it from American Baby.com, and thought of sharing it with you, guys with a hope to inspire and strengthen families as what it did to mine.

"Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you."
-- H. Jackson Brown

"The mark of a good parent is that he can have fun while being one."
-- Marcelene Cox

"Let your child go if you want to keep them."
-- Malcolm Forbes

"Families ought to be noisy."
-- Benjamin Franklin

"Where we love is home -- home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts."
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes

"Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one."
-- Jane Howard

"Nothing you do for children is wasted. They seem not to notice us, hovering, averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks, but what we do for them is never wasted."
-- Garrison Keillor

"Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. 'Pooh!' he whispered. 'Yes, Piglet?' 'Nothing,' said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. 'I just wanted to be sure of you.'"
-- A.A. Milne

"A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold."
-- Ogden Nash

"Home is a place you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old wanting to get back to."
-- John Ed Pearce

"If the family were a fruit, it would be an orange, a circle of sections, held together but separable -- each segment distinct."
-- Letty Cottin Pogrebin

"Our children are extensions of ourselves in ways our parents are not, nor our brothers and sisters, nor our spouses."
-- Fred Rogers

"The family is one of nature's masterpieces."
-- George Santayana

"Parents learn a lot from their children about coping with life."
-- Muriel Spark

"Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children."
-- Charles R. Swindoll, The Strong Family

"When you teach your son, you teach your son's son."
-- The Talmud

Siblings

"Of two sisters one is always the watcher, one the dancer."
-- Louise Gluck

"A sister can be seen as someone who is both ourselves and very much not ourselves -- a special kind of double."
-- Toni Morrison

"I think people that have a brother or sister don't realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there's always somebody there, somebody that's family."
-- Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park

Published on AmericanBaby.com, February 2007.

I Love You...

To my loving husband... as we grow older, hope we can know each other better... not bitter but better. We are not the perfect couple but I know it well... that you're the one for me and hope I am to you as well. I love you... now and forever!

Couple’s Corner # 4: THE MARRIAGE PROPOSAL

It's Wednesday once again, and time for Couple's Corner by Liza of this is My Life. Forgive me for my poor grammar, dry and boring writing, hope you guys still read it.

When Matt and I decided to see each other in person, I didn't expect for more than a visit. He told me that it would be a birthday present as well. So, on the 12th of March 2001, my cousin and I picked him up at the airport. My Aunt was kind enough to accommodate him for the rest of his stay in Malaysia which lasted for exactly a week. He stayed in the guestroom and I stayed with mine. Anyway, after picking him up, we had a talked with my Aunt and her family... just for them to get to know each other. My Aunt and her husband acted as my parents since my parents were not there. They were happy to see and know Matt. I can tell that they liked him the first time they saw him. Honestly, I didn't expect Matt to propose with me that same night! I was speechless and didn't know what to say; so I said nothing. Yes, that fast! No idea what he felt that night. But, I was happy and nervous inside.

The next day, we spent most of the time going to museums and parks, and ended the day with a dinner at the Chinatown with my Aunt and her family. That night before we finally retire to bed, he once again proposed and finally I said: YES even without an engagement ring. He was very happy and apologetic; he told me that he didn't plan to propose to me. But the moment he saw me at the airport, he told to himself that he would like to spend the rest of his life with me. The next day, we went shopping for an engagement ring, but didn't find the one we both like. To make to story short, he sent me the engagement ring by mail (buti na lang di nawala). The ring looked exactly like the one on the photo above only it was a small one. Two months after our wedding, he surprised me with a new one (see the photo above). I told him he didn't have to it, but he said he wants what is best for me! Of course, he also sent mail to my parents in the Philippines asking their permission to marry me. My parents respected my decision and gave my hand for marriage with Matt.